Written By Rodrigo Rey Rosa(Guatemala)P163
提出順、敬称略 |
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Depicted Details
ごえべえ |
The book fails when it tells many details
more than needed.
The story starts from a bathroom. It describes
the hot water and its sound, the light coming
into the bathroom, and so on.
Then he receives a letter, and goes
to see a friend. They talk a while, and spend
a night. Then he departs from a port.
He arrives in a city called Ogman. The
book depicts his memories inspired by
the sound of an anchor makes. The book tells
how the port looks like. Then a boy who is
waiting for him brings him to a house which
looks weird. The book shows what he sees
in details.
He meets an old man in the house where there
is something different and unexpected.
Music sounds continuously.
They drink something. Gradually he annoys
the interior light. They don't talk anything
and the host goes to another room. The
host's shilhouette on the curtain which is
between the rooms looks like a girl. Behind
the curtain a song begins.
He steps forwards, his vision clouds, and
shadow and the silhouette disappear.
The book ends at that point.
なんだかよくわからないけど、ある本が失敗してることを言ってるんですよね?
あまりにも、不必要なディテールを描写しすぎてて、筋も何もないみたい。
それで、プツンと終わってしまう・・・
みんなはどうSummary書くかな・・・
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The Book
Middle-angle |
The book should be without any needless descriptions;
otherwise it won't be successful. Here is
a good ( bad ?) example. You can tell how
boring and meaningless the story is.
The story starts telling about a bathroom
where a man is bathing. It tells too much
about the bathroom before he receives a letter
from his friend. It again goes into details
of his preparations for his trip to see the
friend. After spending a night with the friend,
he leaves from a port.
He gets to a city called Ogman days later.
He meets a boy who takes him to a strange
house. Here again the author gives details
of the port and what the hero sees on the
way to the house.
An old man leads him into the house. It has
no doors between the rooms but curtains instead,
and music is on. They drink something and
nobody speaks. He feels very uncomfortable.
The old man gave him a piercing look and
the interior light bothers him although it
was pleasant at first. It seems to be getting
dark outside.
He was inspired to look into the next
room
beyond the curtain as he thinks he
sees a
girl there. However he isn't sure if
it is
her silhouette or the shadow of the
old man.
When he tries to make sure, both silhouette
and the shadow |
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The Book
ぱんぷきん |
Sometimes I wish I could take a bath alone
without my kids.
For the time being, I do not have such a
quite bathing time. But someday it will come,
alone in the bathroom... what do I remember
by smelling of soap, water..
Anyway, the story starts describing in the
bathroom.
During he takes a bath, he gets a letter
from his friend. He packs his stuff and is
prepared to go. He stays overnight, next
morning he leaves from a port.
The city he arrives is called Ogman. He meets
a guy who leads him far down
a narrow ally. He is scared. The only thing
he does is just take a look around
what's going on around him. He feels really
strange. It takes two hours to
get to the house and the old man opens the
door.
In the house, music sounds continuously.
The old man brings something to drink. They
never speak each other, then old man gets
up goes into next room.
The house has only curtain, there are no
doors.
Behind a curtain next room, a kind of song
is heard. He recognizes the melody and rhythm,
but he does not know exactly.
The curtain moves by the wind. He looks a
girl but a moment later he confuses her
silhouette with the shadow of the old man.
The shadow and silhouette are gone as he
takes a step.
描写している風景はよくわかるのですが細かいところまで書くと長くなるし、Summaryとして自分ではわかっていても他の人にわかるかというと自信ありません。
また来月がんばります。お盆は大阪です。ゆっくり充電してきます。
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The Book
ぽち |
The book fails when the author describes
too much unnecessary details. In this story
he leaves for the voyage, but before he does
the author tells every detail of the bathroom
that he baths in. After describing about
the bathroom including the sound, the light
and the memories the author finally goes
ahead with the story. He receives a letter
and gets ready for his leave. Then he goes
to see the friend who sent him the letter
and the following morning he leaves from
a port.
He arrives in a city, Ogman. The author describes
the sound of an anchor and chains make. He
meets a boy at the port. The boy leads him
to a house. They have walked for two hours.
The author busies himself telling all the
details of what he sees. They go in the house.
There was music which confuses you when you
listen. He sees the old man who asks him
to sit down and have a drink.
And then the author describes that the music
is dying away, the light grows feeble and
he hears a voice behind the curtain. He looks
at the curtain and he confuses the silhouette
of the girl whom he thinks he is looking
at with the shadow of the old man. When he
goes closer to the curtain the silhouette
and the shadow disappear. The book ends at
that point.
The Book というのは特定の(実在する)本ではなくて架空の本のことを言っているんですよね?
こういう本はだめなんだよってことが言いたいんでしょうか?
なんだか著者の意図がよくわからない文章です。
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The Book
さなえ
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.Unnecessary depiction makes the book boring.
There is a story. A man is bathing, he gets
a letter and goes to see a friend who sent
the letter then leaves the town early next
morning. Days later he arrives in a city
meets another friends. The author of the
book busied himself telling whatever he sees.
A man and his guide enter the house. The
house is something different. One becomes
confused by the constant sound of music
from the house. The old man who opened the
door offers drinks to them. The house has
no doors between the rooms but weighted curtains.
A man notices the voice from behind the curtain
in the next door. As the curtain moves slightly
it seems he is looking at a girl. When
he takes a step forward, the shadow disappear.
Then the book ends.
ほんと、意味がわからない本です。。^^;
At that point the book ends.で終わってるところがミソ?The bookのThe、、気になりますよね。。
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The Book
Rilla
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If you go into detail of something more than
needed when writing a story, the book will
be meaningless and boring. Here is one example.
First, the story begins to give a detailed
explanation of the bathroom where a man is
taking a bath. Then, he receives a letter,
prepares for a journey and goes to see the
friend who sent him the letter. He spends
the night and leaves there early the next
morning.
Next, it tells about the place, days later,
he decides to stop over at, where he is called
by name by one parson, and follows him.
After that, it describes the unfamiliar scenes
he sees on his way to a certain house. (The
author gives full detail about what he sees
there, but he does not mention the reason
he has to go there.) Then, his guide gives
four raps on the door. The old man opens
the door, lets him enter and asks him to
sit down at the table. This time, it tells
about the strange atmosphere inside.
He has a mysterious experience that, in the
light growing feeble, he hears unfamiliar
music and a voice someone seems to intone
as if he was having a dream. Then he seems
to look at a girl, and confuses her silhouette
with the shadow of the old man. He takes
a step forward, his vision clouds, and the
shadow and the silhouette disappear, and
then, this story ends.
まだ娘の家にいます。赤ちゃんは可愛いけど、育てるのって本当に大変!
心配でなかなか家には帰れません(汗
お盆までには帰ると思いますが…
今回のお話、本当になんだかよくわからないですね。
英語散歩のたけぼーさんに聞いてみましたら、
「僕もなんだかよくわかりません、これ。
なんだか夢のビジョンみたい。
作者は何をねらってるんでしょうね。
読み手を混乱させることでしょうか。(笑)」
ってことでした。
そうなんですね。失敗した本の例ですから…
The Book の意味、私も最初何かしら????って考えましたけれど
「The pen is mighter than the sword」と同じように、普通名詞の前につけて抽象的な意味を表すのでは?
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The Book
Smiley |
This story describes a book, which is a failure,
because the book contains lots of unnecessary
description, and finishes suddenly without
logical development.
The unnecessary description starts from the
central character’s bathroom. It depicts
some everyday things including hot water,
soapsuds, and so on. After the bath, he sees
his friend, and next morning he leaves on
a voyage.
Then, he arrives in the city of Ogman.
He meets a young man at the port, and the
man takes him to a house. While they’re
walking to the house, he sees quite a few
peculiar things, and makes note of them.
In the house, there is an old man, and puzzling
music is playing. He likes the interior
lighting in the house at first, however he
becomes fretful by the light. After
the old man goes to the next room, the music
fades away, and the room gets dark.
He is drawn to the next room, and approaches
it. When the curtain moves slightly,
he feels as if he is looking at a girl, and
he confuses the profile of the old man with
the girl. Then the image muddles, and
vanishes. At this point, the book concludes,
and we don’t know what happens next.
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今回はRillaさんが娘さんの出産のお世話で、お留守なのにもかかわらず、参加してくださり、感激!それに、新メンバー、ぱんぷきんさんもSummaryを書き込んでくださって、ほんと、嬉しい限りでした。
それにしても、今回の課題、わけのわからない話で、てこずってしまいました。
結局、それでも、みなさん、そのストーリーらしきものをちゃんと要約してくださったみたいで。お疲れ様でした。さて、次回はまともだとは思いますが、いかががでしょうか・・・
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